watchmakersylar: (Glaring)
If absolute power corrupts absolutely, what does it mean that I am corrupting the people I love most in this world? Every day Gabriel becomes more and more like me. He’s killed at my side, after I’d spent months trying to keep him from falling into the abyss with me. I wouldn’t have it any other way now. He’s stronger, and I don’t have to worry about him the way I used to. But his innocence is gone.

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My life was easier when I was hated and feared.

Being loved is so complicated.
watchmakersylar: (Sybrows)
Guilt once a constant companion has moved to the wayside or it had for a very long time. My guilt over Brian had faded. The guilt over Virginia’s death blunted by the truth about my origins as each new piece of the puzzle fell into place. I felt no guilt for the others I’d killed save a moment of occasional doubt for what I’d done to Father Ryan in Chicago.

Last night I got caught. I can’t even claim that I’d been framed. I did the deed. I went with Bennet to Japan and took out five Triad members. I didn’t wait for them to attack first. I could read their emotions and intent as they got to their feet when we busted through the door. Bolts of blue lightning careened through them like the final scene of the Raiders of the Lost Ark. Spielberg would have been amazed as they fried in a daisy chain.

The fifth I left for Bennet. He was her target not mine. I was back up no more. When I heard her cry out in pain, I came running. Whether she can take care of herself, she is mine, and she had been hurt. Number Five would die by my hands instead of her gun.

I found her with her arm turned to wood and fingers snapped off. She’d heal, but with her pain centers reactivated in her brain it wouldn’t be pleasant. It wasn’t going to be nice for walk in the park for Number Five either. With my telekinesis I tore his legs out from under him. He landed face down on the floor, and I was on him. I flipped him onto his back, lost in the joy of murder and sliced his head open.

I didn’t want his power. I wanted his blood on my hands. I smashed his brain like hamburger, and we went home.

Now days later we find out someone took pictures. It was a set up. I don’t know if they got lucky and just happened to be at the kill I took part in or if they’d been to all of Bennet’s jobs. The pictures are being shown by Adam Monroe who should have been dead centuries ago

Monroe has a fascination for Gabriel. I traded places with my brother to see what I could find out, but after hours of boring chit-chat I blacked out. Gabriel found me on the Company rooftop, barefoot and staring into space. I don’t know how I got there.

Peter came and tried to read my mind, but it caused me so much pain that it made me sick. I know it has something to do with the 4 months I lost in Mexico. I can’t trust anyone anymore. I read the memories of the scene, and saw Monroe say something to me that made me black out. It also made me do what he wanted. Peter decided that I shouldn’t be alone until we knew what was going on.

Gabriel called me about the pictures. He said Adam was trying to turn him against me, but that he’d never do that.

Sadly I can’t say the same about Peter. Why in God’s name did I fall in love with a hero? I texted Bennet, and when she got home we told him what we’d done. He accused us of lying to him. I could feel his disgust that he was involved with two monsters like us. He said he needed a time out, to leave and figure out what he thought about it all.

I crossed his name off the list of my possible chaperones.

It hurts that he’s gone. I don’t know if he’ll be back. He’s forgiven me so many other things, but now he knows that I’m still a killer. I will always be a killer.

Do I feel guilty about the murders? No.

I’m disgusted with myself for getting caught.
watchmakersylar: (Default)
He almost killed me. One minute I’m trying to explain how our ability works, and the next he’s hit me in the back of the head with a coffee mug. The irony of that wasn’t lost as my forehead smashed into the kitchen cabinet, and I went down my chin snapping on the counter on the way to the floor. My mouth was filled with blood, and Gabriel was on top of me. He hit me again, harder this time, and I blacked out.

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watchmakersylar: (Little Crazy)
I’m having nightmares, or more accurately memories of what Bennet’s Gabriel did to me when he took my place. Those few days, when I was trapped in my own past, and locked up in a cell on level 5. I hated being Gabriel Gray, and being forced to relive the events of my, oh so exciting, life was torture. I told Bennet and Peter about that, but I didn’t tell them about his personal visits. When he’d come into the cell and touch me while trying to break me. He said I was a waste of a good killer, and that he’d make me one again.

It’s not only what he did to me in that cell, but parts of his life that I absorbed when I killed him. My greed, my need to take back the powers I’d lost to the virus may have caused me more harm than good. Did I need to be able to keep a beer cold, hear a gnat fart or be able to blow up New York? I didn’t take Parkman’s ability. I’ve never wanted to read minds, reading emotions torments me enough, but now I’m starting to wonder if it isn’t still working on me.

I’m afraid I’m losing it. There haven’t been any blackouts that I’ve noticed, but my emotions are frayed. Ever since Gabriel told me what Elle did to him I’ve been angry. It’s brought back all the hurt I felt for her betrayal of me. I’ve been barely able to keep my anger in check. I don’t remember how to be happy or even what it feels like.

Peter tries, and I love him for it. But I’m afraid. When I saw Gabriel in that cell in Bob’s house, I lost all reason. They were going to torture him, break him, turn him into a monster like me, and I can’t allow that. I will die before I let him be turned into another Sylar.

I killed Bob, but I let Elle live. I don’t know why either. She’ll only betray Gabriel or me again. She can’t help it. It’s in her nature. I made her family. I treated her like a sister, and I thought we were friends. But just like every other time I try to make peace with someone I hurt in the past, it’s thrown back in my face that there is no forgiveness for my sins.

Last week I went to Mass, with Gabriel, and I felt nothing but anger there too. I wanted God to strike me down, something, anything, to tell me that what I did mattered. But nothing… The big question is do I want salvation or damnation?
watchmakersylar: (Default)
I don’t remember the last time I wrote here. Things have been complicated. The constant attention at the Company was wearing me thin. All of those people needing bits and pieces of me, clamoring for my attention and praise. Their emotions hitting the walls I put on my psyche like one tsunami after another. Finally I reached a breaking point. I had to get out of there or I’d start killing them. Mass murder on the jobsite isn’t good for morale, and I sure as hell don’t want to spend another night on Level 5 or wherever they’d put me…

Home I went where Bennet and Peter took care of me. Being with her at my most vulnerable is so easy. She’s seen the good in me, the bad and in the horrible. She doesn’t judge me. She loves me monster and all. It’s not blind devotion either. She’s not stupidly besotted with me, so she forgives my darker nature; she loves me as I love her.

Peter is amazing. This Peter is at any rate. Who knew this incredibly good soul could become someone so important to me? I love him. I’d do anything to protect him just as I would Bennet. He helped pull me out of the darkness when those unwanted emotions were drowning me.

I wanted to hurt him, hurt someone, cause pain to find me amid all the emotional stew. He would have let me too because he knew it would help me. But one look into those bright brown eyes, and I lost the fire to destroy.

How can a monster like me love two people so much?
watchmakersylar: (Default)
They’re asleep, curled together in my bed. I tried to rest, but I’m too agitated to let my eyes close. He came from the future, and that means he can come back from there again. I’ve got too much pent up energy and rage. I also feel like a complete idiot for not realizing what was happening sooner. My lack of faith in myself was the chink in my armor that he needed. He played me better than I’ve ever played anyone.

With Peter’s soft snores filling the air, I slipped out of bed and grabbed my laptop. Out on the terrace, I’m waiting for dawn to come over the horizon and typing away. I’m frightened for them. It’s times like this I miss being the lone wolf, but it looks like I have a pack now.

I feel better out here in the fresh air, more able to get my thoughts in order, feel only what I’m feeling. But before I analyze that, I need to write down what I think happened to me and mine.

He’d been watching us for at least a week, while we slept, while we made love, while we laughed and played. He spied on me at the Company, learning my routine, finding out all my secrets. He had all of my powers – including the ones I lost when they infected me with the Shanti virus. On top of that he’d killed the Parkman, Molly and Nakamura from his reality, and so many more I can’t count. I didn’t stand a chance against him.

For clarity’s sake, I’m going to call him Two. He’d done his job well, causing chaos around the Company. He let Linderman and Danko out of their cells. Those escapes had us all running around trying to figure out who the traitor was. Then he fed a special with teleportation to Kenneth Green allowing the Butcher to escape containment.

Parkman scanned Claude and me to clear us. Parkman’s moved back to New York to protect Molly from Danko who came after her. Every employee is being scanned by him to look for the traitor. I need to put a stop to that, since the betrayer was Two.

I was having blackouts. I thought I was losing my mind again, that the DID was back and I’d splintered. But they weren’t blackouts. Two was visiting me; prying into my memories and chatting with me, then making me forget he’d been there. I went to Green’s empty cell to see what happened there, and Two took me. He shut off the blood to my brain and locked me in a cell deeper underground than Level 5.

Two locked me in my memories, leaving me back in Queens at the shop and with my mother. In my head it was ten years ago, and I was trying to get my mother to go on vacation, to give up on my deadbeat father. It was an almost seamless illusion, but once in awhile a glitch happened, something that didn’t belong that made me think I was going crazy in there too. The spectre of my mother kept trying to get me to see a doctor about the problems. If it hadn’t terrified me so much, it might be funny.

In my fantasy Angela came and brought me the watch, the same watch she gave me when I took her on the town. The watch engraved with Gabriel Petrelli’s name, and it needed to be fixed. Then there were visions of Bennet popping in too like a dark ghost.

But I couldn’t fight him. I thought I was insane.

On the outside, in the real world, Two was playing a game with the person I love the most. He let Green out, so he could hurt Bennet. That monster nearly killed her, tearing her apart in public and terrifying her with his brutality. Peter was with her, and he wasn’t able to catch Green or help Bennet. Instead he came back to the Company to get Two to help him save her. Two slowed them down, made sure that Green had time to hurt her.

Then the next day Two went after Peter, telling him how useless he was and destroying the friendship that we’d forged. He needed Peter to hate him, to avoid him to keep him from catching on. He kept Bennet at home, away from everyone too.

I’m not the nicest guy, unless I care about you, so not too many people noticed the difference between Two and me.

Two hated Bennet enough to come through time to hurt her. His interest in me… God I can’t write down the things he wanted to do to me here. He didn’t want to kill me. He wanted me to be the little brother he never had, make me a killer again and make me his toy in everyway possible.

He went to the penthouse to break Bennet. Nearly forcing himself on her and then stopping at the last minute to reject her. He packed her bag and told her to get out. She was still traumatized by Butcher and still didn’t know he wasn’t me. It wasn’t until he started to freeze her that she knew it wasn’t me. I don’t have that power anymore.

Two brought her to my cell and left her there with me. That was his mistake. Bennet and I are bonded. I don’t know how it happened, but with my empathy we can hear each other’s thoughts. She was there with me, and my beautiful girl yanked me away from the fake Queens back to the present. We were still trapped, but at least we were together.

Bennet told me about Two, that I wasn’t crazy, and it wasn’t one of my alters taking my place. Two came back while we were trying to break free, and she begged for my life. He cut into her head again, found the pain centers in her brain that had stopped working and fixed them. She was still half frozen solid and the pain made her scream in agony. Her cries gave me more to cling to, and I finally broke out of the mind trap.

He knew I was free and started beating me. Two kept cutting off my brain’s blood, so couldn’t use my powers. Desperation made me scream in my head for Peter to save Bennet. If she could feel me, I prayed that he could to. By a miracle he did. Peter came, and the two of us took Two down.

We came back to the penthouse after locking up the pieces of Two’s body. His head is in a jar and his body in the morgue where he can’t regenerate.

The goofy kid saved us both, hell he probably saved us all. Kid, he’s nearly the same age as I am, but he’s not jaded like I am, not bitter and broken inside. I know Bennet loves me. She loves Peter too. I think I do too.
watchmakersylar: (Default)
The cosmic balance once again slapped me in the back of the head. I played a game of epic proportions, doing all I could to make things come out the way they should. My deal with the other Sylar needed to be fulfilled, and it wasn’t as if Mohinder had been nice to me. I think if he had shown one bit of kindness that I might not have given him over to the other.

As for the Other, he fascinated me. I wanted badly to see how our mind works. Wanted to watch him hurt Mohinder and to feel what he felt while he did it. I told him too. Expressing my curiosity and my need to experience the pain and suffering of his little pet. He balked at first. Insulting me and bristling that I would dare to get in his way. I wasn’t surprised. I would have reacted the same way.

I let him into the Company, taking him down to the cell where I’d hidden Mohinder. He was far away from the other prisoners on Level 5. The Other was thrilled that no one would hear Mohinder’s screams. I was happy he was happy. It didn’t take him long. The Other didn’t want me there. He wanted to be alone with his love. He grabbed Mohinder and teleported out of the cell to God knows where.

I knew he’d do it, because underneath it all Sylar is still Gabriel Gray, and the little watchmaker is too shy to be watched like that. My own panic when Bennet suggested that Peter join us in bed was the key. The Other would react the same way about my intrusion.

Now Mohinder is out there somewhere, and I couldn’t be happier. He’s away from Angela’s plotting and planning. I’d send out a Company wide memo about his release, but most didn’t know he was there. Those that do have been told that I let him go since we shouldn’t have taken him to begin with.

Claude and I have decided that it’s time for Angela to retire. We have no intension of turning the Company back over to her. After the way she treated me on her miraculous recovery, I feel no remorse for cutting her off. I’ll be just like her other sons, the ones who avoid her because she’s poisonous. Even Nathan thinks she’s dangerous, and he’s always been her favorite.

My victory dinner was ruined when Lyle Bennet showed up. I thought the little shit was in California with his brain damaged mother and pedophile father, but apparently my Bennet brought him here. I love her, but I can’t have Noah Bennet’s child in my house. It would only be a matter of time before Noah came looking for him and accused me of harming Lyle. He’s a belligerent sociopath just like his father, and I wanted him gone.

Bennet left with him, and I brooded alone while I made it rain. I left the engagement ring I bought for her in a puddle on the table. That boy is not her family. He’s Claire’s brother not hers. Why she needs to be involved with him I do not know. I’m her family, and she’s mine. Doesn’t she understand that?

Child Protective Services has been contacted about Lyle Bennet. I listed all of the atrocities of the Bennet house for them from Noah molesting Claire to Lyle shooting his mother. Murphy had a friend of a friend who made sure the report got to the right people. The State can take care of Lyle Bennet now.

I tried sleeping but gave up after tossing and turning for hours. I’m not used to sleeping without Bennet besides me. There are bad things lurking in New York City that late at night. It was a good thing I’m a bigger monster than they are. It’s just a shame none of them were specials. That would have been a nice bonus.

This morning I woke up in my old apartment on top of the Gray & Sons. At least I remember getting here. No blackouts or lost time. I’m still me. I’m still Sylar.
watchmakersylar: (Default)
So many games; so little time

I went with Agent Booth and Claude to the site where REBEL said that Mohinder was taken. The two of them went to root around the building while I touched a few things looking for memories of what happened. When it touched the mailbox, I saw it all. Saw the needle being jabbed into Mohinder’s neck and saw the face of his kidnapper.

It was my face. There is another Sylar. I shouldn’t be surprised. There are two Claires and two Noahs swimming about my reality. Each time Nakamura or Peter plays fast and loose with the time stream they alter our reality causing more ripples on the pond. Everything we do effects the world around us, and when you go into the past you cause ruptures that can’t ever be repaired.

This other Sylar could be from any of a thousand realities. I had no idea what his powers might be. Was he insane? Did he blow up New York? Was he a Petrelli? Did he like donuts? Not knowing what he was capable of sent me down a dark path.

I lied to Claude and Booth. Told them I couldn’t see the tall man’s face. How could I tell either of them that there’s another me out there? When we got back to the Company I excused myself to think. The answer came quickly, but I had to weight the repercussions. I needed more abilities, and I needed them now. So I went down to level 5, and I went to Kenneth Green’s cell.

Green is like me, a serial killer who absorbs other’s abilities. Only unlike me he eats them to gain their powers. I don’t know if he really needs to eat them or if he just thinks he does. I do know he hurt me more than anyone else ever has with the powers he’s taken. Powers that were about to become mine.

He’s being kept drugged to the gills, so he didn’t struggle as I pried open his skull. It’d have used the empathy, but I was afraid of inheriting his insanity. I’ve only been sane and whole a short time, and didn’t want to jeopardize it. I’ve quite enjoyed being only one person.

The blood was everywhere, and I can’t blame the other part of me for enjoying it because I did. I admit it. I miss the feel of it on my fingers. I miss rooting around in someone’s skull and finding that part of them that makes them special and taking it for myself. I miss playing God and holding someone’s life in my hand.

Bennet found me in the cell. She pleaded with me not to do it. I tried to make her understand that it was my only hope of beating the other me. She said she got it, but I don’t know if she did. I could taste her fear.

It wasn’t hard to find the key to Kenneth’s treasure trove. I adjusted my own brain to match while I cleaned up. I wasn’t a complete monster; I healed him good as new on my way out.

Bennet and I went home, so I could wash away the rest of the blood. In the shower I finished changing my abilities, using the falling drops to focus my thoughts. I’d never taken so many at one time before, and I was feeling a little giddy. But above it all I could taste her fear and worry for me.

We made love on the couch. I needed her and wanted her. I had to make sure she knew that I wasn’t leaving her. I also wanted to go into this battle with her taste on my tongue. If he killed me, I wanted to die with her touch being the last happy thing I experienced.

Molly said he was in Queens, so I went to hunt for him, leaving Bennet to rescue Lyle. The wind brought me something of Mohinder’s, a pair of sunglasses, and I used them to find him. The other Sylar had him in a warehouse, and was bleeding him for some reason. He didn’t notice me until I stepped out into the open.

He was deadly. His eyes so black and cold that they gave me chills. Now I know what Molly’s bogyman looks like. He looks like me. We talked a bit, because all super villains have big mouths. Then I tested his powers by cutting him across the face. He healed, so much for my big hope that he hadn’t gotten to his Claire Bennet. He had the other powers the Shanti virus had taken from me too. It was a good thing I’d taken from Kenneth, I was going to need that diamond skin of his.

Then the Other proposed a compromise. Mohinder had run off like the sniveling coward he is. He’d let me take Mohinder and use him to save Angela, and when I was done I’d give him back to this other me. It seemed like a great plan.

I told Mohinder that I killed my counterpart, took him home and healed his injuries. He’s still being a prick. But I’ve got plenty of time to make him do what I want.
watchmakersylar: (Default)
I lost my mother yesterday. Angela Petrelli caught something they created at Coyote Sands to take out specials. We’re keeping her alive in isolation just in case there’s some way to bring her back to us. Alice Shaw was the carrier. She’d been living with it for so long that she’s immune – patient Zero. Angela passed control of the Company onto Claude Rains and me.

I don’t know if I’m ready for this kind of responsibility. But I won’t let her down. I miss her so much. My heart is breaking. If it wasn’t for Bennet, I don’t know what I’d do. I didn’t lose control. I don’t know how I held it together.

Telling Peter was a nightmare for us both. I had him meet me in the middle of the Nevada desert. I couldn’t risk him nuking a city or what I might do when I let the pain out. Peter and I cried, talked and made peace with each other.

I told him about my real mother being Arthur’s younger sister. He’s the first of the Petrellis to find out I am in fact one of them. Nathan will be a harder nut to crack. He hates me, and I don’t blame him. He hasn’t seen the new me like Peter and Claire have. Funny how Claire isn’t a Petrelli, but I am.

Alice is in holding at the Company until we can find a cure. Linderman walked right in giving himself up, but he won’t talk. We put out an APB on Nakamura, who also turned himself in. Claude and I agree that he needs to be taught control over those damned powers of his or else.

My heart is heavy, and it hurts to breathe when I think about Angela. I keep fingering the pocket watch she gave me. I can see her telling the jeweler that my name was Gabriel Petrelli, and that I was her son. Linderman was wrong. She wasn’t afraid of me. She loved me.

Will be changing my name legally. Neither of the Grays wanted me for their son. Why should I carry on their legacy? I’m a Petrelli now.
watchmakersylar: (Default)
Yesterday was a test of my willpower. It was only supposed to be a test for a new recruit to the Company. Her name is Elley Waters, and she was brought in shortly after I assumed by position. Matt Parkman devised a scenario that he’s dubbed the Kobayashi Maru. It’s a no win situation designed to weed out the weak and dangerous Specials who try to work with us.

Bennet and I took the parts of a special seeking sanctuary and the monster hunting her. No need to tell you who played what. It was funny to watch Bennet screaming like a silly little muffy. It’s so out of character for her.

Waters powers are ironically water based. Probably means it’s been inherited through her family line for quite a few generations or god has a sense of humor. God hasn’t been making me smile for a long time, so I’m going with the first option.

The kid was good. She used her ability in ways I’d never thought of. Of course it might have been nice of Parkman to inform me of just what she could do. I’m sure he and REBEL got a big laugh out of that. I can hear them snickering when she started boiling the water in my body.

She took a lot of hits from me, but I was holding back. Sure I can heal what I do to her, but I’ve never tried to raise the dead. Also killing recruits is bad for morale. I can’t believe I give a shit about morale.

It took totaling her car with Bennet in it for her to come close to giving up. I pinned her to the ground after using the sonic blast. Hit her with enough electricity to fry her to the bone too when finally said uncle. Then I healed her, taking all the pain I caused her onto myself.

I don’t like healing. I especially don’t like that the power has a need of its own to seek out and eliminate pain. Remind me never to rip open a priest’s skull again. Father Douglas was my last kill, and I regret taking his power every time it forces me to help someone.

We are on the watch for Linderman. Thanks to Hiro’s fucking with the time stream, he never died, but went into hiding. At least it’s only been for about a year, but is that why the Peter I knew is gone? Is there some cosmic balance sheet that yanks us out of our reality when someone else blunders in?

I met a new Peter, fresh from Kirby Plaza and lost in the cloud, Peter at Nathan’s. We had a long talk. He seems able to accept that I’ve gotten a grip on my issues, and so has the Noah Bennet that appeared this morning. Noah is from the future, and he says he’s been watching us – me – for months before coming out into the open. That’s a very Noah thing to do.

If this Noah and this Peter can help fight Linderman, we will all benefit. I know I’m going to need their help. Right now the only person I can really trust to be there for me is Bennet, and as fast as she is she can’t be everywhere at once.

Dammit, the new girl just caught me in the hall. I’ll send her off with another agent. Rachel Mills isn’t doing anything.
watchmakersylar: (Default)
We’re in danger from a threat from the past. A man who should be dead is back among us because of that idiot Hiro Nakamura. Once again he abused his power and went into the past changing our present and future. I don’t know the actual reasons behind it. I’m in no mood to discuss with Alice Shaw why she went off on her own instead of waiting for Angela or me. Why she felt the need to come home bleeding and near death instead of flying to me on the wind where I could heal her.

Somehow Hiro caught wind of her need. Don’t ask me to explain it. I have never understood how his little mind works. It’s like a hamster running in one of those little plastic balls. He bumps into things along the way, and then instead of going around them he pops back in time to take the obstruction out of his way. Our time line is so polluted by his actions that none of us are who we were meant to be anymore.

Time travel – still of my list of powers I’d like to have. Right up there with mind reading, feeling everyone’s emotions is bad enough without hearing their thoughts.

Linderman asked for a meeting. He used to be very high up in the Company, one of the original members, and a friend to my mother, Angela, not my real mother although he probably did know her. (I need to write about my real mother soon, but I’m not quite ready to deal with those revelations. I also need to make sure my father wasn’t misinformed before I say anything public about it.)

The first thing the crazy old man does is grab my head to try to heal me. I do not like being touched. I sure as hell do not like having someone I don’t know messing around in my head. He kept going on and on about wanting to heal me and make me whole. He wouldn’t listen to me when I told him if it was a physical problem I’d have healed it already. He was pushy. He was nearly manic about it. He wouldn’t listen. I had to push him across the room.

He kept insisting they’d broken me on purpose. That they’d fucked with my mind along the way. Then he made the mistake of bad mouthing Angela. Yes she’s a conniving bitch, but she’s my conniving bitch. I love her. I argued back with him, pointing out the flaws in his logic. Believe me there were holes you could drive a Mac truck through.

Then he tells me something that made me see red. The Hunger almost took control. He told me that Angela was in hiding because she knows I’m Sylar, and she’s afraid of me. I would never hurt Angela. Ever. She knows who and what I am, and she loves me anyway.

I will kill Daniel Linderman. It might take some time since Hiro snatched him back into the past. But sooner or later, Linderman will be eating his own entrails with a nice Chianti.
watchmakersylar: (Default)
Floating in a sea of crude oil, that’s where I found myself. My toes could barely reach the bottom and each wave tossed me deeper into the black. I started to swim, fighting the flood of Gabriel’s psyche. I had no concept of time, and I had no idea how long I’d been locked away. The slime clung to me with each stroke I took as I tried to reach the shore. My skin was covered in clots of muck that chilled me to the bone. No matter how far I swam the shore never got closer.

The sky was burning white. No clouds. No sun. Nothing but glare. It hurt to look at it. The yin yang aspects weren’t lost on me. I was caught between heaven and hell, good and evil, life and death. Trapped in my own mind while Bennet was out there with Him. Gabriel, whose soul was a myriad of grays and shadows growing darker all the time.

I felt it. The shift when Bennet turned from curiosity to prey. The itch at the base of my skull that said take her and feed. Fingers wrapping around that chunk of ugly crystal. The thirst to murder filling my being.

“Gabriel!” Shouting wouldn’t help. He wouldn’t hear me. He was lost to it. The hunger more part of him now than it was me. It would want to be with the weaker of us, since that one would be easier to control. Sometimes being able to figure things out is a curse.

Floating and fighting the boundary between the light and dark wasn’t getting me anywhere, so I dove down into the black. Once I broke through the membrane it sucked me down, a force I couldn’t fight if I tried.

Images of what he was doing flashed before me. He was hurting her, terrorizing her and I had to stop him. All those powers we’d collected were there for me to use, and this time I’d use them on myself.

I woke up in the street or I should say came back to life. Throwing Gabriel in front of a city bus wasn’t part of the plan, but it worked wonders. He was back where he belonged, and I had to patch things up with Bennet. If she hates me for what he did, I don’t know what I’ll do.

She was huddled in the back of the shop. Covered in blood, and not much else. I had to coax her out to let me touch her. I told her I love her.

I won’t let him have control again. I can’t. He’ll kill her. My only real choice is to integrate. I don’t want them to be part of me neither one of them. But there are no other options.
watchmakersylar: (Default)
Where did the days go?

He’d been in control for so long. It wasn’t like it used to be. I couldn’t watch from the cage in my mind. There were only glimpses when he bothered to remember I existed. The rest of the time I was just caught in a long dreamless sleep.

I felt like so much less than I’d been before. Sylar had stolen more of my life from me, my essence and my soul. Why couldn’t it have been me that Angela gave the pocket watch to? Did she even know she was telling that murdering bastard that she counted him as her son? I doubted it. I’m sure she thought he was me.

And if she didn’t, I didn’t care. I hated him. Want my life back. I’m sure he’s laughing at me from the dark corner of my mind where he sits like a poisonous spider waiting to break free to devour anyone in his way.

This Claire looks at me, her eyes full of pity. My Claire is with Noah on the other side of the country. It would be so simple for me to solve my problem. I could just kill him. Snap his neck with a flick of my fingers. Boil his blood with the heat of the sun while his eyes sizzle and pop like overripe fruit. The thought makes me smile.

Sylar loves this dark girl from the future. I can feel it at the edges of my awareness when I look at her. Should I share his feelings for her when I know my sweet girl is being ruined by the foul love of her father? I need to save Claire.

I need to kill Noah Bennet.

I know I promised her that I wouldn’t hurt him, but what choice do I have? It’s the only way for me to be Prince Charming.
watchmakersylar: (Default)
Sgt. Karrin Murphy is a character from the Dresden Files. She is RP'd on twitter @sgtkarrinmurphy

It’s like a nightmare. Murphy took me to the crime scene where they found the first victims. I was still shaky from recalling what the Other had done to her in the car, but I’d offered to help her to make up for hurting her. It was an abandoned shop. Murphy got rid of the uniforms watching the place, and we slipped under the yellow police tape. It stank of old blood and death. The linoleum was covered in graying puddles of old blood, and there was no question of where the bodies had been.

I tried to pick up impressions of the scene. I could watch from his POV as he slaughtered one of the children, but Murphy needed to see his face. There was no surveillance left in the place, but the tried and true corner mirror was still in place. The mirror came off the wall easily for me. I dusted the cobwebs off the pitted surface and touched it calling on the power I’d taken from Bridget.

He butchered them, stuffing his face with raw meat from their cooling bodies. He licked the blood from his lips while shoving left over chunks into plastic garbage bags. His hair was almost white blond, and his eyes were so blue they glowed. I couldn’t stop watching as he slaughtered each of them. Murphy had to tear my hands away from the mirror. I lost my lunch. It was so brutal. Worse than anything I ever did. He was actually eating them.

Murphy took me back to her place. We drank most of a bottle of Scotch. Well she did. I drank mostly water and fell asleep on the couch. When I woke up I could still taste the blood in my mouth. Had to brush my teeth twice to get it to go away.

I found Murphy in her at-home command center. Apparently she’d taken time off from the Chicago PD to work on the case since the FBI was running all over it. She also needs to keep me under the radar. Angela took care of any warrants on me, but there could still be trigger happy cops out there who don’t know.

She had everything, files on the victims including profiles, and was getting ready to make a murder board with map. She went to get us coffee and handed me the list of victims on her way out. I read over it quickly, memorizing the names, and went to get my laptop. I knew I’d seen some of those names before. They were in the Company records. Not all of them.

He’s killing specials. He’s eating their flesh. He’s one of us. He’s like me.

He’s not in the database. His face doesn’t come up. Who the hell is he, and is this what I’ll become with time?
watchmakersylar: (Default)
My personal life is at a crossroads. After bringing Claire back to her family, I spent the day with Bennet. That’s the other Claire. I can’t call her Claire. They are so very different. Bennet is steady, strong and smart. She’s everything I wish Claire could be. She thinks that neither one of us wants the other – Bennet and I – she wants her Gabriel, and she thinks I want Claire.

I don’t want Claire. I admit I love her, but it’s a love destined to death and failure. I don’t like failure. I can’t fight for her. Not when I promised not to destroy Noah. I’m caught by my promise. Gabriel still loves her like a sick puppy. He’d be happy for a hand held or a glance, but I’m not. I’m an all or nothing kind of guy. I’m sure as hell not going to share her affections with Noah.

Bennet wants Gabriel, the nerd, the gentle, the timid. She went out of her way to point out I couldn’t keep him locked away forever, and that sooner or later I’d have to let him have control.

That’s the all or nothing again. I like being the public face now that the insanity’s been shoved into his own little corner of our psyche. I don’t understand why she wants him. He’s a coward, afraid of his own shadow. She’d eat him alive. I can give her so much more.

It frustrates me that I can’t be what either of them want. And I’m not sure I want to be. Isn’t the old saying a woman gets involved with a man because she hopes he’ll change and a man gets involved with a woman because he hopes she doesn’t?

I like Bennet. I like her a lot. If she stops poking at me to let Gabriel out, I could see us becoming more than friends with benefits. She’s my equal. She could be my partner. I wouldn’t have to spend all my time trying to fix her and her life. She came back to save Gabriel, but couldn’t she just love me instead?
watchmakersylar: (Default)
And then there were three…

I’ve been examining my mental state. That shouldn’t be a surprise, I analyze every thing else. I changed radically since waking up in my shop back in Queens a few weeks ago. I don’t quite remember how I got there. My clothes were soaked in blood. The kind of blood that only comes from a head wound. The back of my coat was soaked with it, and I was nearly stuck to the floor. I watched as the tall man stepped through a vortex leaving me a warning not to go back to Chicago. I didn’t remember being in fucking Chicago. Not since we took a trip there when I was in high school.

The man’s name was Harry Dresden. I’d been after him for his power. But the power he used on me had changed me. I was Gabriel when I came back to life in the shop. I remember watching him stumble about trying to get his bearings again. Gabriel was in control for quite awhile until the blackmail started. He couldn’t handle it, so I stepped forward.

That’s when I started to suspect that Gabriel isn’t the one who was changed by Harry Dresden touching our soul. I was the one who’d been ripped in two. I’d been splintered like Gabriel had been by my birth from his guilt and greed. He created me to handle his lust for power and his need to be more. The hunger for power consumed me, I’d bounce from being in control to being a soulless monster, but now I was different.

I’m still Sylar. But I’m not insane. I’m not hungering to tear into someone’s head to steal their powers. I still feel the want, but it’s no longer a need for me. My mind is crystal clear, I can see things from Gabriel’s past better than before. I’ve always been the one who could see both sides of the coin, while he blacked out most of what I did. But now when I remember my acts of violence they don’t seem to be part of me either.

My theory was confirmed when Claire rejected me. She said she didn’t care that I was Sylar, but she still sent me away. Gabriel came forward when I went to watch the sunset. But he didn’t stay in charge for long. The other filled the void before I could stop him. Rage, hurt, betrayal feeds the hunger like chum attracts sharks. He is the one who went after the bookshop keeper in Brooklyn. He’s the one who fought the Other Claire when she tried to stop him from killing.

Funny how I can think of Gabriel as I, but I cannot think of the Hunger that way. He is an alien thing to me now a part of me I do not want to be integrated with. I feel like Kirk in Turn About Intruder. I don’t want the wolf to be part of me, us, again, but I know someday he’ll need to be.

Sitting in Karrin Murphy’s car, I can see flashes of what I did to her. The Hunger was part of me when I carved my initial in her cheek. It drove me to brutalize this woman if only to make Dresden angry enough to come after me. It disgusts me. The old Sylar would have been proud, but I’m not. Gabriel would try to kill us again if he could see it. I want to ask Murphy what I did when I was here, because I don’t remember. But I’m afraid to ask.
watchmakersylar: (Mom and me)
Today I took Angela to the theatre. We went to see Wicked. I showed up at her house with daisies for her. I’m sure Nathan brings her roses, so I wanted to be different. I like daisies. They are simple and fresh. She seemed quite shocked that I know how to clean up, but then she’s seen me at my worse.

I asked her about her dreams while we put the flowers in a vase. She wouldn’t tell me what she’d dreamt about me, but she told me they were good dreams. Having her believe in me nearly takes away the pain of Claire’s rejection. I wish that didn’t bother me, but it’s hard for me to let things go.

We took a cab to the theatre. After being blackmailed by her previous driver, I wanted the safety of traveling with a stranger. Angela thought it was sweet to see how the other half lives. I wonder what she’d think if she saw the apartment I grew up in over in Queens. I am the other half after all.

I told her about forcing Noah to tell his wife about his affair with Claire. I was worried that she’d be disappointed in me, but she understood my motivations. She was shocked to find out that Noah had been with Claire, and I think she gets why I can’t be friends with Claire anymore. I asked her if she’d be upset with me about wishing I could have been there to watch Noah’s family implode. She said that it made sense. He’d hurt me, and it was normal for me to want him to suffer for it.

Dear god, thank you for bringing Angela Petrelli into my life. She worries about me and thinks I should make up with Claire. If not the Claire I lost, then I should find a way to be close to the other Claire. That’s easier said then done since she’s avoiding me. I think they’re together in Paris.

I got us a private box for the play. When we took our seats, Angela gave me a gift. I told her she didn’t have to, but she just laughed at me. Inside the box was a fine silver pocket watch. One of the best you can buy. Inside it was engraved – Gabriel Petrelli. I cried like a baby. When I asked her if her boys would be upset she said, “No dear I give them lots of shiny things.” She told me they’d just have to adjust to me being part of the family.

Hopefully that goes over well. Her sister Alice told me I could call her auntie. Alice is crazier than I am, but she’s sweet.

And yes, I’d love to get my hands on her weather control ability, but I can resist temptation.

Later there was an emergency at the Company. Matt Parkman – you know the fat mind reader – called to say he was bringing Noah Bennet in. Seems dear, sweet Noah has been running amok at home. He’s been blaming me and Claude for all the ills in his life. He had some sort of breakdown, and REBEL called the cops on him. Parkman got involved, and got Noah from the cops to keep him from talking about Company business.

Angela accepted my offer to help with Noah, so I went to Primatech with her. Parkman had Noah, who was almost foaming at the mouth with him. I wrapped him up tight, and we shoved him into a cell. It was nice to see him on the inside of one again. Hopefully the third time’s a charm, or is this the fourth time? Well it’s the third I’ve put him in.

He was screaming that I was to blame. That Angela was stupid to trust me. That Martians were anally probing him, and Jimmy Hoffa was behind it all… Nuts, a whole can of mixed nuts is our Noah. Once he was in the cell, I leaned against the glass and made him read my lips. “I win.”

Parkman was justifiably concerned that I was with my mother. I did put 5 slugs into his chest at Kirby Plaza during that unfortunate episode, so I don’t blame him. But Angela told me I was trustworthy and safe. She had me take Noah’s idiot kid home to his mother after Parkman made the kid listen.

All in all, it’s been a great couple of days. Noah Bennet’s locked up where he can’t hurt Claire anymore. He’s going to be mind probed by Parkman. He’s lost his standing with the Company, and I’ve got a mother who loves me. Life couldn’t be much better.
watchmakersylar: (Default)
I do love it when a plan comes together. It was a win-win for me from the beginning. I’ve made Clairebear hate me, and I got to see the Bennet family melt down. Lyle’s run away from home. Sandra wants Noah arrested and is leaving him. Noah never even got to tell Sandra he was screwing Clairebear, Lyle did it for him. Beautiful.

Noah blamed it on Claire, of course, saying she’d seduced him with her wiles or whatever. Then he said it was my fault, because we all know I have mind control and made him hump his daughter. Please if I had mind control, I’d have made him eat his gun and blow his brains out.

Once the dust settles, it’ll be interesting to watch. I know Claire 2.0 got Clairebear out of there before the fireworks started. Pity, she should have been made to watch.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m taking my mother to the theatre. My work here is done.
watchmakersylar: (Default)
I’m living in a musical; only the band keeps forgetting to play. It is so phantom of the opera my situation with Claire. I was her secret friend and supporter, maybe not exactly secret, but certainly kept to the shadows. I was an idiot to think I loved her. She’s a child and as broken as I am.

That’s my love life for you. One wants to be with me twenty-four hours a day telling her she loves me and the other would rather be with the man who changed her diapers. I almost killed out of my anger at Claire, but I didn’t. I was stopped by her doppelganger.

This other Claire, the dark haired version, stayed with me until I woke up from my exhausted sleep. I’m trying not to let the pain destroy me, so instead I’m using it to build walls around me. I’m supposed to be a loner or just alone. Either would cause me less mental trauma. I don’t handle rejection well.

Claire, I should call her Claire-bear like Noah does to keep them separate in my head, called three days later to see how I was. I’d already decided that making her hate me would be best. I don’t want her calling me, or needing me, or wanting to bake me fucking cookies. I want her gone. I want Noah dead.

She was crying – of course – spouting off about not living up to my expectations whatever that means. Couldn’t I just understand and give her my blessing while she let Noah climb between her legs. Claire-bear is helpless you see. She can’t control how she feels about him.

But I would be in control of how she feels about me. I was cruel to her. Said things that would haunt her for years if she gave a shit about how I felt. Ripping into her with each carefully worded sentence.

Then I played my trump card. I told her to tell Noah that he had twenty-four hours to tell his wife that he’s fucking his daughter. It’s going to be so hard to wait that day. I can’t wait to stir the shit into that mix. Claire-bear thinks I’ll call to do it. Don’t be silly, little girl, I’m going to do it in person. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

I’m basking in the glory of my plan to ruin the Bennet clan once and for all, and the other Claire comes back. She’d gone shopping. Apparently my empty refrigerator bothered her. She told me she found a place to live.

I told her not to let the door hit her in the ass on her way out.

We’re alone now. Me, myself and I.
watchmakersylar: (Default)
Sylar: There was no real plan. I found the name on the list. He lived in Brooklyn. Not too far for me to go. The need to kill was eating me alive. I couldn't drink. Talking to god got me nowhere. The loneliness hurt. If I was careful, no one would know. I knew how to be careful.

Claire: I was going to fucking kill Hiro. Gabriel didn't live where he should be in this line. I was lost and had no clue where to go. I needed to find him. I hadn't known at the time.I hadn't known how much the kiss had meant to him. I hadn't known he would kill so many.

Sylar: He was a round little man who ran a used bookstore. The bells chimed as i walked in. It was almost closing time, but I didn't mind. The sound of his grandfather clock brought a smile to my face. It was almost like coming home. "I'm looking for a first edition Tolkien." He stared at me through his dirty glasses, then reached under the counter. I jumped over it before he could stand back up, pinning him down.

Claire: Just to get out of the drizzle I pop into this little bookstore. No real reason to it, I just felt miserable. I didn't want to fail.. again.

Sylar: It was a tight space back there, filled with paper dust and mildew. "This really is like coming home for me. Now hold still." I raised my hand, but I can't cut. No, then they'd know. Instead I hold him in place and put my hand on the back of his skull, drinking in his fear. It tastes good, almost as good as the blood did when it splattered on my lips. His power, I can feel how it works in his brain. I copy it.

Claire: The clerk was no where to be seen. "Great." I rub my bare arms when I hear a frightened gasp. "Hello?"

Sylar: Eyes closed while I rewire my brain, making sure I don't lose anything while I take. He whimpers. I cut off his air supply.

Claire: I walk up to the counter and look over, "Fuck! Gabriel!" I vault over the counter more surprised then relieved to have found him. "Gabriel stop!" I yell as I aim a kick to get him away from the guy.

Sylar: Claire's voice. How funny to hear her now. The man chokes, struggling to live. Then a foot slams into the back of my head.

Claire: I hop over the man and get between him and Gabriel. "You don't want to do this! Think. Breathe. Listen to my voice."

Sylar: With a wave of my hand, I send her across the shop. I leave the fat man on the ground. "Time enough for you later. Who the hell are you?" The new ability clicks into place, but it's nothing that'll hurt anyone. Shame that. "Lunch?"

Claire: I slam into the wall across the shop taking several bookcases with me. "Surely you haven't forgotten already." I say as I get up and race towards him too fast for him to see me. "Thank you Daphne." I say, not wanting to him him. "That almost hurt."

Sylar: She's fast. A blur of black leather and dark hair. I don't care. It means she's special. It means she has something I don't.

Claire: He moves super slow, at least while I'm running he is. I try and get the shop owner out, but I'm still just a buck ten.

Sylar: I send a ball of lightning at her. I don't know if I singed a hair on her head. She's too fucking fast. "You should have taken me out first instead of trying to save him." I send more blue bolts at her in a wide spray.

Claire: I take a few bolts to the back and stand back up, my shirt ruined, bra too. "Damn it. My only clothes..." I run around behind him smelling burnt hair. I sweep his feet out from under him, I really didn't want to hurt him. "Elle tried that and ended up in the hospital for months."

Sylar: She's too fast. Knocks me down. Hard. I need more offensive powers. No more booksellers with photographic memories. I spread my hands pick up mountains of books, send them crashing against her like bricks. "That'll slow you down, bitch."

Claire: Pages scatter as I collide with the books. Blood mixes as I get thousands of paper cuts. If I could feel pain, I would be so pissed. "You drew first blood." I circle the store cyclone-ing the loose papers and then sweep his feet once again.

Sylar: "Set your hair on fire, thing that counts first don't you." I hit the floor again. Busting my nose on the industrial carpet.

Claire: I sigh, "Gabriel it's me. I don't want to hurt you." Damn it. I run to his side. "Are you ok?"

Sylar: "Sucker." My hand wraps around her ankle, while I use my power to bind them tight. "No more running. Time to die."

Claire: I stumble, not able to move my feet. Reacting too fast for him to see I draw my gun and shoot him in the leg before he has a chance to finish the word, 'die.'

Sylar: I'm laughing so hard, tears run into my eyes. "My leg. You shoot me in the leg!" I squeeze the barrel of the gun with my mind, making it useless. I get up slowly, finally taking a look at the dark haired pain in my ass. "Claire?"

Claire: My faces flames when he starts laughing. I should have shot him in the head. "I didn't want to hurt you. Not anymore."

Sylar: "Didn't want to hurt me!" I pace in a circle around her. "Then why are you here? I don't want to see you. I hate you."

Claire: You don't hate me, you hate that blonde teeny-bopper who doesn't realize what she fucked up.

Sylar: She's different. The speed. "Did Peter teach you that? Family trait to steal power after all." I lick the corner of her mouth.

Claire: I haven't moved since he got up and it takes all I have not to devour his mouth, but I know I'm not talking to my Gabriel not yet, "Family? trait? No." I think of Peter. The man I'd forsaken Gabriel for. It was Noah in this line. Sick.

Sylar: "When are you from?" I'm not stupid." I can see you're older. Not any wiser who are you?" I touch her face, finger along her lips then down her throat. "I already have the healing, but that speed. I want that. More than I ever wanted you."

Claire: I can't help but lower my eyes from his. His words stabbing into me, "I'm your Claire, or was... 2025..." My hand comes up over his, which is on my neck.

Sylar: "I don't have a Claire. You picked Noah. That disgusting piece of shit. Your father. You'd rather fuck him than touch me."

Claire: I tried not to look sick, but the thought of Noah Bennet, my biological father touching me in such a way. I think of Peter instead and answer truthfully. "You called me 'sister.' I didn't know your feelings had changed so much when you kissed me. I couldn't have known for sure that you wouldn't think it a mistake the next day..."

Sylar: "And it was better to stay with him? Peter, Noah?" I wanted to strangle her. Pop her head off. I reached for her, but my hands wouldn't move. Tears of rage were streaming down my face. "I didn't know either. I don't know now. I'm lost."

Claire: I look up into his eyes as I hear his tear-filled words. My eyes tear up too. I bring my hands up, slowly to his neck "I lived sixteen years with a wrong choice... I watched you disintegrate into a thing, a mindless thing all because I didn't know what you meant when you called me your anchor, when you kissed me. I'm trying to correct my mistake."

Sylar: "It's been three days, Claire. Three days. I don't know who I am anymore." I let her touch me. "Loved you. I'm scared."

Claire: My hand slides from his neck to over his beating heart, "I'm your anchor. Listen to my voice and remember."

Sylar: "I tried. I tried to be good. Didn't want to hurt. Didn't want to feel." I rest my head on her shoulder. "Can't get drunk."

Claire: I pull him fully into my arms. I nuzzle his neck. His smell is so distant in my memories, but this isn't a memory. "You were the only one who could ever make me feel..."

Sylar: "Take me home, please Claire, take me home." I couldn't stop crying. I kissed her through tears. "Please love me."
Claire: This was my Gabriel, he was mine once more. I kiss his tears as I hold him close to me. "You don't have to ask me to."

Sylar: I just nod. Words are too hard to form. The hunger is gone, replaced slowly by my tattered sanity. We leave the shop and its owner behind. Claire stopped me from killing him. I hadn't become a murderer again. "We can get a cab to Manhattan."

Claire: I was shaking now. The reality was catching up with me. "I can't believe I found you in time... I..." My hand on his arm was shaking I could clutch it. "I almost lost you again..."

Sylar: I resist the urge to ask her what makes her think she has saved me. Too tired to pick a fight. I tell the cab driver my address, and we settle in for the ride. It feels good to have her next to me. She's so very different. Strong, Brave. A hero.

Claire: I can't stop staring at him. He's the same man, but so different. I look into his eyes and frown, "I know I am not the exact same Claire, but I do love you just as much as she will one day." Perhaps now was not the best time, but I needed him to know that the other Claire was still here, still real and not completely at fault. I can't have him hate her.

Sylar: I let out a snort, and turn to look out the window at the dark city. The streets are nearly empty, like my soul. "I don't care what she does. Someday I'm going to laugh and tell her I told you so." So I'm mean. Big surprise to no one. The cab pulls up in front of my building. The doorman glances at us. He thinks I'm drunk and picked up some bimbo. Whatever.

Claire: His words should hurt, but they only make me angry... At myself. I should have known it wouldn't so easy. He'd been very "So I was naive? So I didn't realize what it meant to be your anchor. I was ignorant. She was ignorant..."

Sylar: "It doesn't matter. Not anymore." We get into my loft. I'm so tired I want to puke. Don't remember when I ate or slept last.

Claire: I'm too angry at his blasé words to care when I push him down on the couch. "You're being childish Gabriel Petrelli!"

Sylar: "Petrelli?" I push her hands away. "Stop that. Gray. My last name is Gray. That Petrelli thing was a lie Angela used on me to make me her little pet." I frowned, looking at the brown blood stain on my wall from my hand. "She loves me though."

Claire: I back away from him, he obviously didn't want me touching him. "You aren't a Petrelli? Gray.." I look down, "Sorry, glad I clear my throat, "I'm glad Angela loved you then." I wrap my arms around myself. I feel lost. The changes are small but they seem to big compared to my past memories.

Sylar: "That's what I really went to California to tell you." I rub at my face. I need to shave, badly. My stomach growls. "She caught the blackmailer. She told me she counts me as her son. I was so happy. I wanted to share that with you."

Claire: "Then I should have been happy for you..." I pause lowering my eyes, "In my line Gabriel, we were good friends and I was a love-sick fool for Peter. I was an idiot for not realizing my feelings for you." I turn to see the view from his windows.

Sylar: "So you were with Peter not Noah." I repeat the information now that I'm somewhat sane. "It's not your fault. I didn't realize how I felt about you until it was too late." I get up and trod into the kitchen. "Never told you and when I did. It didn't matter." Fridge was devoid of edible food. "Furry strawberry?"

Claire: I wrinkle my nose, "I should have known..." I say low, then louder. "No rotten fruit for me, thanks." She should never have chosen Noah. Peter's one thing, but her adoptive parent? Over Gabriel? Bitch. I hated this Claire.

Sylar: "I'd offer you the Chinese, but it smells worse than I do." I shut the door and headed for my bed. "How long, Claire? Sixteen years?” I said, my hands are shaking, so I let her help me into bed. “So you’re older than me now, huh?”

Claire: “I guess I am,” Claire said, as she sat down next to me. “How long have you been awake? And who am I talking to?”

Sylar: “I don’t remember the last time I slept.” I placed my hand over hers, smiling a bit when she didn’t pull away. “And I’m Sylar. You’re talking to Sylar.”

Claire: “Good, you’re always reasonable.” I pulled the blanket up over him after getting up. “I’m going to take a shower. You go to sleep.” I picked at the ruins of my clothes. “And I’m going to borrow something of yours to wear.”

Sylar: “Will you be here when I wake up?” I was afraid to sleep. Afraid that I’d lose control again. “I don’t want to be alone.”

Claire: “You never do.” I paused, hand in his dresser drawer taking out a shirt of his. “You didn’t kill, Sylar. That’s what matters.”

Sylar: “But I wanted to. The hunger was in control.”

Claire: “Well it’s not now. You are. So go to sleep. You’ll still be you when you wake up.” I padded across the floor and leaned over him on the bed, tapped him on the end of his nose. I would have rather kissed him, but it was too soon. Bridges needed to be rebuilt between us. “Or I’ll just have to kick your ass again.”

Sylar: I listened to the water hitting the shower walls and let it lull me to sleep. Hopefully I would still be me when I woke up. Problem was, I really did like that speed power of hers, but there are other ways to get it.

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Sylar - Gabriel Gray

July 2012

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