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Blog - Twitter RP - May 19, 2009
May. 19th, 2009 09:43 amWhat the Lord giveth, the Lord taketh away…
Once again that old adage proves true. So many changes in my life in such a short time. It’s been days since I slept or ate anything. Been living on coffee since the meeting with Kade. I didn’t have the stomach for anything else.
Angela saved me. She found the weasel in her employ and persuaded him to leave me alone. I’d have preferred to do the persuading myself, but if I’d pressed the matter, she’d have known that Gabriel was gone. Unlike Claire, I didn’t think I could tell Angela the truth.
Then when I agreed to let her handle it, she told me she was my mother in all but blood. I didn’t know what to do. It made me cry. I told her I loved her. I think she might have cried on her end of the phone too.
I was so tired. But I needed to tell Claire. I had to tell her I was going to be all right. I also needed to get too far from New York to give into my nastier nature and go behind Angela’s back to kill the guy. That’s the difference between Gabriel and me. He’d have gone right in to do it, screw the consequences. I’m the careful one, the planner. The brains of the operation.
I was happy when I got to Claire’s. It was a long trip, but I knew the passage through the shadows well. I was in such a hurry I forgot to put on shoes, and my sleeve was bloody from cutting my hand on a broken glass in my living room. I didn’t care though. I just needed to see her. I needed to tell my friend that I was okay.
It was a move worthy of Gabriel. Maybe I’m not as smart as I think I am. It was broad daylight and fucking Noah was home. I knew he was there, and I didn’t care. I baited him from her bed, where she made me rest while getting me something to eat. Knocked over her lamp and couldn’t stop it before it shattered on the floor.
She came back with food, which I gratefully ate. She hurt herself on the broken lamp, but she felt no pain. I broke her you see, when I took her power. Her amazing brain didn’t heal right, and it was all my fault.
Then Noah came in with a gun. I knew he would. I was a rooster in his hen house. I’m surprised he isn’t bending his son over the bed yet. Disgusting horny dirty old man, I hate him. He hurts her and hurts her, and she still goes back to him. I hate him more than anyone on the planet. More than I hate my father.
Lyle came in just in time to see his father shoot me and hit him over the head with a potted plant. Chaos erupted then. I tried to stay out of the way while I healed. I could feel how much she loved him. I could feel it over his hatred of me. I slipped past them to get him some water. Mostly I just wanted to escape.
There wasn’t enough water in that house to clear my head. When Claire came into the kitchen I asked her if she wanted me to go. I knew what her answer would be. How could I be so stupid? How could I let myself have feelings for her of all people? Each time I told someone she was like a sister to me, I’d been trying to hide what I was really feeling. I was pathetic.
She didn’t ask me to stay. She couldn’t. I did the only thing I could do before I walked out of her life. I kissed her. I kissed her hard and deeply, daring Noah to come up behind me with a bullet for my brain. I didn’t care. I just wanted that one kiss.
Barefoot and exhausted I walked several miles to the beach where I watched the sunset over the Pacific. It was beautiful. I waited until dark. It would be easier for me to travel then. I wanted to go home to lick my wounds. To sit in the dark in my loft and brood.
But most of all, I wanted to find someone on the list to kill.
Once again that old adage proves true. So many changes in my life in such a short time. It’s been days since I slept or ate anything. Been living on coffee since the meeting with Kade. I didn’t have the stomach for anything else.
Angela saved me. She found the weasel in her employ and persuaded him to leave me alone. I’d have preferred to do the persuading myself, but if I’d pressed the matter, she’d have known that Gabriel was gone. Unlike Claire, I didn’t think I could tell Angela the truth.
Then when I agreed to let her handle it, she told me she was my mother in all but blood. I didn’t know what to do. It made me cry. I told her I loved her. I think she might have cried on her end of the phone too.
I was so tired. But I needed to tell Claire. I had to tell her I was going to be all right. I also needed to get too far from New York to give into my nastier nature and go behind Angela’s back to kill the guy. That’s the difference between Gabriel and me. He’d have gone right in to do it, screw the consequences. I’m the careful one, the planner. The brains of the operation.
I was happy when I got to Claire’s. It was a long trip, but I knew the passage through the shadows well. I was in such a hurry I forgot to put on shoes, and my sleeve was bloody from cutting my hand on a broken glass in my living room. I didn’t care though. I just needed to see her. I needed to tell my friend that I was okay.
It was a move worthy of Gabriel. Maybe I’m not as smart as I think I am. It was broad daylight and fucking Noah was home. I knew he was there, and I didn’t care. I baited him from her bed, where she made me rest while getting me something to eat. Knocked over her lamp and couldn’t stop it before it shattered on the floor.
She came back with food, which I gratefully ate. She hurt herself on the broken lamp, but she felt no pain. I broke her you see, when I took her power. Her amazing brain didn’t heal right, and it was all my fault.
Then Noah came in with a gun. I knew he would. I was a rooster in his hen house. I’m surprised he isn’t bending his son over the bed yet. Disgusting horny dirty old man, I hate him. He hurts her and hurts her, and she still goes back to him. I hate him more than anyone on the planet. More than I hate my father.
Lyle came in just in time to see his father shoot me and hit him over the head with a potted plant. Chaos erupted then. I tried to stay out of the way while I healed. I could feel how much she loved him. I could feel it over his hatred of me. I slipped past them to get him some water. Mostly I just wanted to escape.
There wasn’t enough water in that house to clear my head. When Claire came into the kitchen I asked her if she wanted me to go. I knew what her answer would be. How could I be so stupid? How could I let myself have feelings for her of all people? Each time I told someone she was like a sister to me, I’d been trying to hide what I was really feeling. I was pathetic.
She didn’t ask me to stay. She couldn’t. I did the only thing I could do before I walked out of her life. I kissed her. I kissed her hard and deeply, daring Noah to come up behind me with a bullet for my brain. I didn’t care. I just wanted that one kiss.
Barefoot and exhausted I walked several miles to the beach where I watched the sunset over the Pacific. It was beautiful. I waited until dark. It would be easier for me to travel then. I wanted to go home to lick my wounds. To sit in the dark in my loft and brood.
But most of all, I wanted to find someone on the list to kill.
