Sylar - Gabriel Gray

Dear Sylar,

I see you in the mirror everyday when you’re brushing your teeth and pretending to shave. I watch the things you do, and I wish I could make you stop. But you don’t listen to me. You don’t listen to anyone. You’re above all of that. Above having a conscience, above caring that you hurt people because you thrive on jealousy. You like to pretend you do it because you’re better than they are.

But I don’t think you are. You’re still me. No matter how hard you fight me, and how deeply you’ve shoved me into the dark corners of your soul. I’m still here, and I feel sorry for you.

No one loves you, and no one ever will. You’re a monster, and I wish I’d been able to stop you in time.

Someday I’ll get my life back, and won’t you be surprised when that happens? It’s a shame you’ve ruined so much of it.

I don’t hate you. How could I? You’re me, and I’m you. But I don’t like you anymore than anyone else does.

Sincerely,
Gabriel Gray

The Letter Blog

Dear Parkman,

You didn’t think I’d let you slide after the shit I’ve dumped on Angela and Bennet, did you? I’m recording this message, so you don’t need little Matty to read it to you. I thought about using little words that you might understand, but it’s been ages since I could write at a 2nd grade level.

Honest to fucking god, at what point did you think you were doing a good thing when you went into my head? You knew it was wrong! You knew that it was murder. It made you worse than your father! How could a supposedly good human being, a cop no less, do that to someone lying helpless? Sure I’m a murderer, but who made the three of you judge, jury and executioner?

I will always treasure the look on your fat face when you discovered me hiding in your head. Believe you me I wish I hadn’t been there. Christ your life was worse than Gabriel’s. Could you have spent any more time kissing Janice’s ass?

Not that it wasn’t a fine ass. The woman is hot, and so very kinky. Bet you never knew that. Hell I bet she misses me.

So here we are now. I’m back in my body, and I’ve supposedly found redemption. I’ve given up killing to be a hero. That all may be true, but only time will tell if I can keep control of my hunger now that I’m whole and free.

But not killing doesn’t mean I’m not still a mean son of a bitch. If I ever hear you taking credit for me turning over a new leaf, I will reach down your throat, past the three dozen donuts you’ve got in your stomach and strangle you with your intestines.

Keep this in mind too. The day I decide to give into my baser instincts you are number three on my list. I thought having Bennet be number two was appropriate, and you do not rank as number one.

Hope you enjoy living in fear of the day I come for you.

Sincerely,
Sylar

The Letter Blog

You Have My Heart,

That is my promise to you. Every time I look at the ring on my finger, I think about you, and the promise we made to each other. I promise to be there for you. I promise to listen to you. I promise to tell you if I’m hurt and need help. I promise to gut anyone who ever hurts you. I promise to be your brother, your lover, your partner and your friend.

Forever and Always,
Sylar

The Letter Blog

Dear Gabriel,

Hey look, another letter to you, little brother. I know it’s a sure sign of how incredibly fucked in the head I am, but my favorite memory will always be you smacking me in the head with that coffee mug when we were fighting about Elle. You were so mad at me, and I admit I was pushing your buttons. I wanted you to see that you deserved better than that whore, but you knew that already. But I still wouldn’t back down. I had to push and push and push until you snapped.

My chin hit the counter, nearly bit clear through my tongue too. Then you did the one thing you hadn’t before. You dug around in my brain for a power while you had me down, your fingers in my brain kept me from healing. I was scared for a few moments that you’d be too lost in the hunger to let me regenerate.

But you did. You let me come back, and I was so mad at you. I remember screaming at you to use my name, backing you into a corner while we smeared my blood all over your floor. I was livid, but we still took care of each other because that’s what we do. We cleaned each other up and the apartment. Then I stayed with you all night.

The only way it could have been better is if I’d kissed you the way I wanted to. I wish I hadn’t been afraid. Stupid isn’t it? I wasn’t afraid of making you angry, but I was afraid to tell you that I was in love with you. Of course I hadn’t realized it until that night either. That’s the real reason it’s special for me. It’s when I stopped turning a blind eye to what was right in front of me all along. The person I needed the most was you.

Forever and Always,
Sylar

The Letter Blog

Dear Peter Petrelli,

How many times have you gotten away from me? The first time in Texas, the second time in Mohinder’s apartment when I had you on the wall, and then there was Kirby Plaza where Hiro took me out. I can’t begin to count the times since then when you came for me until the Washington when you shoved that needle into my throat, making it possible for Angela to destroy me.

When you came for me behind Parkman’s wall did you ever ask me why I killed Nathan? I don’t remember you ever asking me why I did anything. To you I was just a rabid animal with no remorse, no regrets, incapable of having a single human emotion. You knew for sure that I wasn’t capable of love.

Well you’re wrong about that. I killed Nathan out of jealousy. You loved him when you wouldn’t give me a chance. When Angela said we were brothers, you loathed me. No matter what I did to make you care about me, you wouldn’t. It was always Nathan before me, and now that I have Nathan’s memories in my head I can see that all from his perspective as well.

We broke out from the Wall when you forgave yourself for making peace with the thing that killed your brother. But I want to know, Peter, should I give you another chance? You say you understand, but do you? Can you be my friend now? Should I open myself up to you?

I’m willing to try, but if you hurt me, I will kill you.

Sincerely,
Sylar

The Letter Blog

Dear Elle,

You lying sack of shit. I am so disgusted that I fell for your lies. I swear it’s one of the biggest reasons that I don’t let Gabriel out of his corner of my brain. How the fuck did someone as smart as I am believe one word that came out of your mouth? You destroyed any chance I had at being human.

How you lied to me, let me list the ways:

1 – You came into the Shop to con me into falling for your big blue eyes. As if any girl that looked like you would pay attention to Gabriel.

2 – Pie. You bribed me with FOOD, with pie! You bitch!

3 – The jealousy card. At least if you were going to force feed me a special and drive me to murder, couldn’t he have had a good power to steal? For fuck sake, what did I need Trevor’s stupid power for anyway when I already have telekinesis? I should have killed you!

4 – You tried to kill me at Mohinder’s! I was broken! I had no powers, and you tried to shoot me! By the way you are a lame shot, Princess. Why didn’t you zap me?

5 – So we meet again at Pinehearst, and do you tell me that Arthur and Angela are lying to me about being my parents? NO!!! You let me believe that bullshit. Where’s the love and trust there, baby?

6 – The car rental guy? Seriously, Elle, did you have to punch all my buttons again? Did you get off on getting Dorkwad to try to protect you from the serial killer? I was playing Arthur, Elle. I’m not stupid.

7 – Then the eclipse hit, and I apparently lost my mind. Can’t believe I wasted time fucking you on the floor of that house. Nice of Bennet to wait until we were done before he started shooting though, but then Bennet did like watching us together, didn’t he?

8 – The fact that I died to protect you shows how out of my mind I was. It showed me that you were a weakness that the Gabriel part of me felt a need to save. So you were a liability I couldn’t afford.

I did enjoy killing you on the beach. You were so sure I was going to do you on the sand. Sorry it wasn’t the way you wanted me to.

By the way, thanks for the phone. That list of targets was really helpful.

Glad you’re dead,
Sylar

PS - I thought of one good thing about you. You weren't Maya.

The Letter Blog

Dear Me,

I am the person I wish I could be. I’m so smug and arrogant that they’ll be putting pictures of me next to the definitions in the Oxford English Dictionary. Google searchrs for evolution and special come up with my name too.

I am all that and a big fucking bag of chips.

Gotta love me.

I know; I do.

Sylar

The Letter Blog

Dear Molly,

I’m not sure what I want to say to you. I’m not sorry that I killed your parents. I mean if I hadn’t done that, you’d have never gotten to live in New York with those losers Mohinder and Parkman. You’d have never been shipped off to India, and barely remembered by your two loving fathers. I mean sorry, kid, but the second Mohinder saw Maya and Parkman saw the blonde chick with the weird hair it was all over for you. You just weren’t important to them anymore.

I hope you’re having a ball in India. I did hear that you came stateside for awhile, helping out Rebel. Sorry I missed you, but you’re still too young for me. You see, Molly, I still want your power, and someday I’ll get it.

And your little dog too.

All my love,
The Bogeyman

PS – I didn’t appreciate it at all that you were more afraid of Maury than me.

The Letter Blog

Letter to lizfirestarter

Dear Liz,

I don’t have many friends in this world. Hell I can count them on one hand, and ever since I quit working for the Company a huge chasm has appeared between us. I was so hurt by the things Scully told me that went on at the Company when I walked. To hear that you and Jack thought I would start running amok, treating you all like an all-you-can-eat buffet showed me how little faith you had in me. Did it ever occur to you, that I could have been running willy-nilly through the halls all along, and there wasn’t jack squat any of you could do about it?

But I didn’t because I’m not like that anymore. Scully knows it. She still believed in me. Instead of panicking, she came to see me. She found out about Gabe, and she knew that I wasn’t the one who killed my secretary.

I know we had a bit of a disagreement when Krycek took over the new Company too, because I found out what Jack did to you and Scully. I’m sorry, but that asshole hurt two of the people I care about – you and Dana. He is lucky I haven’t found a way to end him permanently, or that I don’t spend days on end killing him over and over again for fun.

Do you know why I don’t? Because you love the bastard. You could do so much better. You came to my house after it was all over, when Gabe and I finally felt like we could have company over, but you barely spoke to me. I don’t know if our friendship can ever be repaired, but I trusted you Liz. I trusted you to believe in me, and you let me down.

Your friend,
Sylar

the Letter Blog

Character: Sylar
Fandom: Heroes
Word count: 443
Rating: PG
Prompt: Bruce Wayne: I'm not afraid of you. scifi_muses
Notes: Letter Meme and muse prompt fulfillment.

Bennet,

I almost wrote this letter to Angela, because she is the cause of so much pain and misery in my life. But I decided that you deserve it more because for all her twisted evil machinations, Angela at least takes responsibility for her own actions. You always fall back to blaming the Company for yours.

It was always the Company told me to do it. The Company told me to set you up, Gabriel. The Company told me to send Elle into your shop to manipulate you into murdering someone again when you were perfectly happy to kill yourself. The Company made me evil made me walk the fine line of gray.

Well to that, Bennet, I say bullshit.

You’re a man of above average intelligence. You’re more than capable of making your own choices in life, and you should have known better. You helped Chandra make me what I am, and then you play the family card when the Company excuse doesn’t work.

You hurt my daughter! Waa! Waa! Waa! Well guess what, Noah! SHE CAN’T DIE. Short of cutting her empty little head off and keeping it far, far away from her body, nothing I did to her is permanent. For all I know you’d end up with two little Claire-Bears if I did that, one growing from the head and the other from the body. Shame there’d still only be one fucking brain cell between the two of them.

So I traumatized her a little when I stalked her through your house, but I said I was sorry. I don’t apologize often, and I never do it unless I mean it. You on the other hand couldn’t tell the truth to God himself. You lie even when your lips aren’t moving.

You’re a bigger monster than I’ll ever be. I didn’t betray you when Angela made us partners. I’m not the one who was plotting ways to kill you. Hell I saved your fucking life when they had you in that bank. But you couldn’t see past the monster, the man you made me.

How about you do something different, Noah? Accept some responsibility for your mistakes. Admit that you’re the one who made a monster. You’re the one who destroyed your family.

By the way, where did Larry get to? Did you ship him off to military school or something? Must have made him feel good that Claire was so much more important than he was for you, and Mr. Muggles was more important to Sandra than he was too.

I don’t want you dead, Noah. I want you to suffer for as long as humanly possible.

Sylar

The Letter Blog