May. 24th, 2009

watchmakersylar: (Mom and me)
Today I took Angela to the theatre. We went to see Wicked. I showed up at her house with daisies for her. I’m sure Nathan brings her roses, so I wanted to be different. I like daisies. They are simple and fresh. She seemed quite shocked that I know how to clean up, but then she’s seen me at my worse.

I asked her about her dreams while we put the flowers in a vase. She wouldn’t tell me what she’d dreamt about me, but she told me they were good dreams. Having her believe in me nearly takes away the pain of Claire’s rejection. I wish that didn’t bother me, but it’s hard for me to let things go.

We took a cab to the theatre. After being blackmailed by her previous driver, I wanted the safety of traveling with a stranger. Angela thought it was sweet to see how the other half lives. I wonder what she’d think if she saw the apartment I grew up in over in Queens. I am the other half after all.

I told her about forcing Noah to tell his wife about his affair with Claire. I was worried that she’d be disappointed in me, but she understood my motivations. She was shocked to find out that Noah had been with Claire, and I think she gets why I can’t be friends with Claire anymore. I asked her if she’d be upset with me about wishing I could have been there to watch Noah’s family implode. She said that it made sense. He’d hurt me, and it was normal for me to want him to suffer for it.

Dear god, thank you for bringing Angela Petrelli into my life. She worries about me and thinks I should make up with Claire. If not the Claire I lost, then I should find a way to be close to the other Claire. That’s easier said then done since she’s avoiding me. I think they’re together in Paris.

I got us a private box for the play. When we took our seats, Angela gave me a gift. I told her she didn’t have to, but she just laughed at me. Inside the box was a fine silver pocket watch. One of the best you can buy. Inside it was engraved – Gabriel Petrelli. I cried like a baby. When I asked her if her boys would be upset she said, “No dear I give them lots of shiny things.” She told me they’d just have to adjust to me being part of the family.

Hopefully that goes over well. Her sister Alice told me I could call her auntie. Alice is crazier than I am, but she’s sweet.

And yes, I’d love to get my hands on her weather control ability, but I can resist temptation.

Later there was an emergency at the Company. Matt Parkman – you know the fat mind reader – called to say he was bringing Noah Bennet in. Seems dear, sweet Noah has been running amok at home. He’s been blaming me and Claude for all the ills in his life. He had some sort of breakdown, and REBEL called the cops on him. Parkman got involved, and got Noah from the cops to keep him from talking about Company business.

Angela accepted my offer to help with Noah, so I went to Primatech with her. Parkman had Noah, who was almost foaming at the mouth with him. I wrapped him up tight, and we shoved him into a cell. It was nice to see him on the inside of one again. Hopefully the third time’s a charm, or is this the fourth time? Well it’s the third I’ve put him in.

He was screaming that I was to blame. That Angela was stupid to trust me. That Martians were anally probing him, and Jimmy Hoffa was behind it all… Nuts, a whole can of mixed nuts is our Noah. Once he was in the cell, I leaned against the glass and made him read my lips. “I win.”

Parkman was justifiably concerned that I was with my mother. I did put 5 slugs into his chest at Kirby Plaza during that unfortunate episode, so I don’t blame him. But Angela told me I was trustworthy and safe. She had me take Noah’s idiot kid home to his mother after Parkman made the kid listen.

All in all, it’s been a great couple of days. Noah Bennet’s locked up where he can’t hurt Claire anymore. He’s going to be mind probed by Parkman. He’s lost his standing with the Company, and I’ve got a mother who loves me. Life couldn’t be much better.
watchmakersylar: (Default)
And then there were three…

I’ve been examining my mental state. That shouldn’t be a surprise, I analyze every thing else. I changed radically since waking up in my shop back in Queens a few weeks ago. I don’t quite remember how I got there. My clothes were soaked in blood. The kind of blood that only comes from a head wound. The back of my coat was soaked with it, and I was nearly stuck to the floor. I watched as the tall man stepped through a vortex leaving me a warning not to go back to Chicago. I didn’t remember being in fucking Chicago. Not since we took a trip there when I was in high school.

The man’s name was Harry Dresden. I’d been after him for his power. But the power he used on me had changed me. I was Gabriel when I came back to life in the shop. I remember watching him stumble about trying to get his bearings again. Gabriel was in control for quite awhile until the blackmail started. He couldn’t handle it, so I stepped forward.

That’s when I started to suspect that Gabriel isn’t the one who was changed by Harry Dresden touching our soul. I was the one who’d been ripped in two. I’d been splintered like Gabriel had been by my birth from his guilt and greed. He created me to handle his lust for power and his need to be more. The hunger for power consumed me, I’d bounce from being in control to being a soulless monster, but now I was different.

I’m still Sylar. But I’m not insane. I’m not hungering to tear into someone’s head to steal their powers. I still feel the want, but it’s no longer a need for me. My mind is crystal clear, I can see things from Gabriel’s past better than before. I’ve always been the one who could see both sides of the coin, while he blacked out most of what I did. But now when I remember my acts of violence they don’t seem to be part of me either.

My theory was confirmed when Claire rejected me. She said she didn’t care that I was Sylar, but she still sent me away. Gabriel came forward when I went to watch the sunset. But he didn’t stay in charge for long. The other filled the void before I could stop him. Rage, hurt, betrayal feeds the hunger like chum attracts sharks. He is the one who went after the bookshop keeper in Brooklyn. He’s the one who fought the Other Claire when she tried to stop him from killing.

Funny how I can think of Gabriel as I, but I cannot think of the Hunger that way. He is an alien thing to me now a part of me I do not want to be integrated with. I feel like Kirk in Turn About Intruder. I don’t want the wolf to be part of me, us, again, but I know someday he’ll need to be.

Sitting in Karrin Murphy’s car, I can see flashes of what I did to her. The Hunger was part of me when I carved my initial in her cheek. It drove me to brutalize this woman if only to make Dresden angry enough to come after me. It disgusts me. The old Sylar would have been proud, but I’m not. Gabriel would try to kill us again if he could see it. I want to ask Murphy what I did when I was here, because I don’t remember. But I’m afraid to ask.


watchmakersylar: (Default)
Sylar - Gabriel Gray

July 2012

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