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Continued from HERE.
I didn't want to move. This was the only place I felt safe anymore, safe, wanted or needed. When I was in Heidi's bedroom I didn't wonder who I was, and why I felt so disconnected. I felt like I belonged. It was harder to leave each and every time. I brushed my thumb over her beautiful lips, and reluctantly forced myself to move. I stretched, feeling the muscles in my shoulders shift.
"My head hurts," I told her. My neck hurt and my face, but that was becoming a daily occurrence. The pain wasn't chronic, but it happened in spurts. Like all the other weird things that had been going on. Keys and coffee cups flying into my hands, the lightning that fried the laptop in my office last week. All this moments of power that no one could explain to me, except possibly Peter, and he still wouldn't return my calls. I was beginning to hate him.
"Do you think the boys would forgive me if I did hide in bed with you all day?" I closed my eyes and stretched out next to her again, hoping that she'd say it'd be all right to stay home. "I don't suppose we know anyone who can make it rain?"
I didn't want to move. This was the only place I felt safe anymore, safe, wanted or needed. When I was in Heidi's bedroom I didn't wonder who I was, and why I felt so disconnected. I felt like I belonged. It was harder to leave each and every time. I brushed my thumb over her beautiful lips, and reluctantly forced myself to move. I stretched, feeling the muscles in my shoulders shift.
"My head hurts," I told her. My neck hurt and my face, but that was becoming a daily occurrence. The pain wasn't chronic, but it happened in spurts. Like all the other weird things that had been going on. Keys and coffee cups flying into my hands, the lightning that fried the laptop in my office last week. All this moments of power that no one could explain to me, except possibly Peter, and he still wouldn't return my calls. I was beginning to hate him.
"Do you think the boys would forgive me if I did hide in bed with you all day?" I closed my eyes and stretched out next to her again, hoping that she'd say it'd be all right to stay home. "I don't suppose we know anyone who can make it rain?"
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Date: 2009-09-30 03:34 am (UTC)From:I smile when he says that and I do it again, I don't compare him to Nathan when we're in bed together, it's a completely different experience. Even though he has Nathan imprinted on him when he's with me, alone with no mirrors in sight I believe it's just me and him, whoever he is.
"I love you." I whisper and I do, even know it shouldn't; I know this can't possibly end well for me but I don't care, I need him.
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Date: 2009-10-01 05:55 pm (UTC)From:Moved us over - I hate squishies