Continued from HERE.
I didn't want to move. This was the only place I felt safe anymore, safe, wanted or needed. When I was in Heidi's bedroom I didn't wonder who I was, and why I felt so disconnected. I felt like I belonged. It was harder to leave each and every time. I brushed my thumb over her beautiful lips, and reluctantly forced myself to move. I stretched, feeling the muscles in my shoulders shift.
"My head hurts," I told her. My neck hurt and my face, but that was becoming a daily occurrence. The pain wasn't chronic, but it happened in spurts. Like all the other weird things that had been going on. Keys and coffee cups flying into my hands, the lightning that fried the laptop in my office last week. All this moments of power that no one could explain to me, except possibly Peter, and he still wouldn't return my calls. I was beginning to hate him.
"Do you think the boys would forgive me if I did hide in bed with you all day?" I closed my eyes and stretched out next to her again, hoping that she'd say it'd be all right to stay home. "I don't suppose we know anyone who can make it rain?"
I didn't want to move. This was the only place I felt safe anymore, safe, wanted or needed. When I was in Heidi's bedroom I didn't wonder who I was, and why I felt so disconnected. I felt like I belonged. It was harder to leave each and every time. I brushed my thumb over her beautiful lips, and reluctantly forced myself to move. I stretched, feeling the muscles in my shoulders shift.
"My head hurts," I told her. My neck hurt and my face, but that was becoming a daily occurrence. The pain wasn't chronic, but it happened in spurts. Like all the other weird things that had been going on. Keys and coffee cups flying into my hands, the lightning that fried the laptop in my office last week. All this moments of power that no one could explain to me, except possibly Peter, and he still wouldn't return my calls. I was beginning to hate him.
"Do you think the boys would forgive me if I did hide in bed with you all day?" I closed my eyes and stretched out next to her again, hoping that she'd say it'd be all right to stay home. "I don't suppose we know anyone who can make it rain?"
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Date: 2009-09-27 05:48 am (UTC)From:"I'm sure they would, they're just ecstatic to see you. We can miss one day of family fun. I don't know anyone who can make it rain, but I know the next best thing." I reach over and pick up the phone, calling my mother. She is more than happy to come by and get the boys for their outing.
"Thanks mom," I hang up and give him a smile "Now you, where does it hurt? Can I kiss it better?"
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Date: 2009-09-27 06:14 am (UTC)From:"Remind me to buy your mother a dozen roses. Does she like roses? I don't remember." All I remember about Heidi's mother is the woman not getting along with Angela, not that, that's hard to believe. No one with a heart likes Angela. The last place I want my children is spending time with my mother. "I love spending time with you and the boys, Heidi. I really was an idiot to let you go."
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Date: 2009-09-27 10:28 am (UTC)From:I nod when he mentions my mother "Yeah, she does and I don't blame you for not remembering, it's been ages since you saw her last." I'm happy to play along, reminding him of things that he truthfully has no memory of.
"Yeah, you kind of were. Hopefully that is behind us now." I chuckle "Of course now it's six in the morning and we will have all day to ourselves, whatever shall we do?"
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Date: 2009-09-27 06:56 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2009-09-27 09:16 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2009-09-27 10:27 pm (UTC)From:"Maybe next time we should sleep on the kitchen floor, so we're closer to the refrigerator." I chuckle. "Well if the boys spend the night at your mother's. I wouldn't want to explain why mommy and daddy are naked in front of the dishwasher."
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Date: 2009-09-28 02:43 am (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2009-09-28 03:21 am (UTC)From:"Careful that tickles." I roll over and grab her, pulling her on top of me. I cup her face, drawing it to me and capture her mouth with mine. "Love you."
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Date: 2009-09-28 03:35 am (UTC)From:"Is tickling bad now?" I ask as I wriggle on top of him, my legs falling either side of his body. I blush when he says he loves me, I wonder if he means it or if he has just been programmed to say that. "Love you too."
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Date: 2009-09-28 04:18 am (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2009-09-28 04:25 am (UTC)From:"I don't know, it's been a while since we've been together but I'm sure if you were your mother or brother would have mentioned something about it to you?" I know what a tight leash Angela keeps Nathan on and if he was Nathan now, I believed that pattern would continue. "When did you start feeling this way?"
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Date: 2009-09-28 04:37 am (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2009-09-28 04:43 am (UTC)From:I give him a cheeky smile "I'll talk to you, I love talking to you." I reach up and press my fingertips lightly to his temple "Whatever it is, whatever they aren't telling you, we'll get to the bottom of it."
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Date: 2009-09-28 04:54 am (UTC)From:When I can catch my breath, I wrap my hands around her waist. "I love talking to you too. I'd be so lost without you, Heidi, but I'm scared. What if I have a brain tumor or something?"
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Date: 2009-09-28 05:03 am (UTC)From:"I don't think it's that." Observing him these past weeks I believe I've figured out what it is, they have brainwashed him to think he was Nathan, for what purpose I don't know. I wonder what really happened to my ex-husband, only briefly because I find myself enjoying the company of his replacement much more. His hands on my waist feel huge and I smirk "We're in kind of a compromising position here."
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Date: 2009-09-28 05:12 am (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2009-09-28 05:22 am (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2009-09-29 05:03 pm (UTC)From:I'm Heidi's. I like being Heidi's.
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Date: 2009-09-29 09:59 pm (UTC)From:I knead his chest with my fingers, leaving light scratches behind only I notice them starting to fade moments after.
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Date: 2009-09-30 12:27 am (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2009-09-30 03:34 am (UTC)From:I smile when he says that and I do it again, I don't compare him to Nathan when we're in bed together, it's a completely different experience. Even though he has Nathan imprinted on him when he's with me, alone with no mirrors in sight I believe it's just me and him, whoever he is.
"I love you." I whisper and I do, even know it shouldn't; I know this can't possibly end well for me but I don't care, I need him.
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Date: 2009-10-01 05:55 pm (UTC)From:Moved us over - I hate squishies
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Date: 2009-10-01 05:55 pm (UTC)From:"God Heidi." I cup her breasts, before lowering my mouth to tease one nipple until she squeaks. "I could stay like this forever."
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Date: 2009-10-01 09:52 pm (UTC)From:"I'll just call up the senate and tell them you can't come into work because your wife is fucking your brains out."
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Date: 2009-10-02 12:50 am (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2009-10-02 02:20 am (UTC)From:Sure we could spend it as a family, but we've been doing that pretty much every day since he returned. "When mom comes and gets the kids, I'll ask her to take them for the weekend."
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Date: 2009-10-02 10:26 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2009-10-02 10:53 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2009-10-03 06:06 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2009-10-03 11:56 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2009-10-04 12:47 am (UTC)From:My hand is still in her hair as she stretches out on my chest. I run my other hand down her back, fingers lightly trailing down her spine. We should get remarried, but it's probably too soon for that.
"When's your mother coming?"
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Date: 2009-10-04 12:57 am (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2009-10-04 01:20 am (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2009-10-04 01:30 am (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2009-10-04 05:20 am (UTC)From:After my shower, I get dressed and go downstairs to make breakfast for my family. I've never been happier.